


For Whom the Bell Tolls

by ForeshadowedFate



Category: Death Note
Genre: Alternate Ending, Drama, Gay, Guy on Guy, Hurt/Comfort, Lemon, M/M, Male Homosexuality, Male on Male, Man on Man, Romance, Smut, Supernatural - Freeform, Yaoi, boy on boy, light yagami versus kira, light yagami x l lawliet, sex scene, suspense/thriller, third-person point of view
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-02
Updated: 2014-10-02
Packaged: 2018-02-19 14:15:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 15,465
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2391356
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ForeshadowedFate/pseuds/ForeshadowedFate
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Light is at a crossroads with his feelings for L: his true self loves him, but Kira wants him dead. While searching for the detective, he eventually finds him standing outside on the rooftop of the Kira task force's headquarters building, alone and seemingly depressed. Wanting to know what's wrong with the man, Light attempts to confront L about it only to receive a rather cryptic, vague response from him. Not only this, but Light soon learns that L may not be alive by the end of the day due to unforseen circumstances, and that if he wants to do something about it, it may mean giving up the very dream he's had since the first the day he picked up the Death Note.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Deluge

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry if the dialogue in this first chapter comes directly from episode twenty-five in the anime, titled "Silence," but I wanted to keep it to make it more... I don't know, believable. The next chapter will (mostly) be the same as well, but everything after that is pretty much completely original. Also, I changed up a few things from the original canon pertaining to this day, but you'll probably catch them easily enough by the end of this first chapter.
> 
> -Disclaimer- I never have, nor will I ever own the awesomeness that is "Death Note."

Light walked with a purpose, his tennis shoes making soft sounds as he made his way to the door leading to the roof. He wasn't really sure why he was heading here to begin with. At first, he was curious as to where L had run off to, as he hadn't seen or heard from him anywhere in the building for over half an hour.

He'd given the whole task force the day off today, which really surprised Light because he'd never done anything like this before. His father informed him that he'd seen the dark haired detective walking in the direction of the roof when Light asked about his whereabouts. But then, for some unfathomable reason, his curiosity turned into genuine concern for the man. But why?

Why should he actually _care_ about where his archenemy went and what he did with his life? His brain told him that he was only looking for L because he wanted to know if he was doing something that could jeopardize Light's situation, but his heart told him that he was searching for him because he really wanted to know where he'd gone off to and was actually concerned about his well-being. This, he had to admit, just plain confused him.

Although, to be honest, L hadn't been himself lately. Ever since the close of the Yotsuba murders on October 28, Light had noticed some subtle changes in the man. He almost seemed... defeated, like he'd just completely given up on the Kira case and somehow knew something was going to happen to him in the near future.

The man was already basically an enigma, so reading into his thoughts and feelings would have proved to be near impossible, even for someone like Light. He often found himself wondering just what was going on in that brilliant mind of L's. What did he think about all day? He _had_ to have thoughts that pertained to things other than the many cases he always worked on.

Light half-wished that he and L could have met under different circumstances. It would have been so _amazing_ to work alongside the world's greatest detective! Solving the most difficult cases imaginable, bouncing ideas off of him if he wanted to discuss something, possibly becoming his work partner or even a close friend. But it wasn't to be.

Any chances he may have had of being anything other than L's enemy were instantly shattered to pieces from the moment he picked up that Death Note. He found it hard to believe that it had almost been a whole _year_ since taking on his role as Kira. He was quite surprised that L hadn't caught him yet.

Then again, he'd been extremely careful to cover up each and every track he'd made so far. Of course, being the world's greatest detective and having help from police agencies all over the world, L was able to pick up on several clues vital to the investigation that many others would have simply missed. Still, he didn't have any solid evidence to convict Light or Misa as being the first and second Kiras, respectively, so Light was winning in that aspect.

From the moment he'd realized that L was investigating the murders he'd committed with the Death Note and revealed his intentions to him, Light had vowed to uncover his true identity and kill him. They'd both been playing this game for nearly a year now, and all Light had to do was make one final move to rid himself of the detective once and for all. However, there was just one problem, one thing keeping him from killing the man: He'd begun to develop feelings for him.

Not just a friendship like it had been when they were working on the Yotsuba murders together, but feelings of _love_. No one in his life had ever even come close to L. His appearance, his mannerisms, his profession, his mind, his beliefs.

The man was more like himself than anyone else he'd ever known. Not physically, of course, but mentally? Absolutely.

Light honestly didn't care if they were both men or not. If he loved someone and they loved him back equally, who was anyone to tell them that they couldn't be in a relationship simply because of their sexuality? Love was love. It was meant for two people to decide whether or not they wanted to share it with each other and no one else.

Of course, Light had had female lovers in the past, but none of them ever really _meant_ anything to him. For the most part, he enjoyed their company, but he was never actually in _love_ with any of them. He just dated to be social and get to know some people, not to actually be in a loving, caring relationship with anyone.

He sighed to himself as he walked, now nearing the door. Maybe in another life, he and L could have had something special. He sometimes thought about the possibilities of that scenario and allowed them to play out in his mind like movies when he was alone. But now wasn't the time to think about that.

Right now, he was going to walk through this door, find L, and bring him back inside. Light wondered just what the hell he was doing out in the middle of a thunderstorm like this, but he merely shrugged as he gripped the handle of the metal door and pushed it open. He was sure that there were just some things about L he would never really figure out.

As soon as he stepped past the threshold and out onto the roof, he was blasted by a wave of cold air and relentlessly pelted by heavy rain. Letting the door close behind him, he only had to look straight ahead to find the lone figure standing on the roof. The object of his curiosity was hunched over, hands in his pockets and looking up to the sky. Being the person he was and the important position he held, Light never would have expected L to experiment with illegal drugs, but he was seriously starting to consider that possibility now that he knew what the man was doing out here.

Light was about to call for him when L slowly turned his head and met the teen's gaze. He looked so despondent. Light had never seen him this melancholy before, almost as if he'd lost a relative or a loved one. His dark hair and clothing was plastered to his body as if taped down. Light wondered if he even realized that he was completely soaked.

He called out, "What are you doing, standing out there by yourself?"

However, he hadn't considered the possibility that the deafening sound of the rain and thunder overhead would make normal conversation at this distance nearly impossible. L attested to that fact by putting a hand behind his ear and slightly leaning in Light's general direction.

Cupping a hand near his mouth to project his voice farther and more directly to L, he repeated the same words, louder this time. Again, L leaned forward even more with his hand still to his ear, a smile gracing his face. Light wasn't sure if L was just screwing with him or if he actually couldn't hear his words, but that smile made him feel slightly warm in the seemingly subzero climate out here. Maybe because it was so rare that L ever _did_ smile.

Nonetheless, he groaned in annoyance at having to cross the monsoon that was raining down from the heavens and soaking him to the bone. Reluctantly, he shielded his eyes from the torrents of rain and made his way over to the man. He'd only been out here for about a minute and he was already drenched.

 _Great,_ he thought sarcastically. _It's going to take hours for these clothes to get dry._

He stopped a few feet away from L, who wasn't currently looking at him. He was close enough to use his normal volume of verbal communication.

"What are you doing, Ryūzaki?" Light asked using L's alias.

"Oh," L acknowledged that Light was speaking to him. "I'm not doing anything in particular, it's just..." he paused and gazed up at where he was looking earlier.

"I hear the bell," L finished.

Light's eyebrows rose ever so slightly in surprise. What did he mean by that?

"The bell?" he questioned.

"Yes," L glanced over at him for a second before returning his gaze to where it had been moments before. "The sound of the bell's been unusually loud today."

Light wasn't one to automatically jump to conclusions, but he suddenly thought that maybe he shouldn't rule out the possibility of drug use just yet. In any case, he decided to oblige the detective and glanced from side to side, trying to find this "bell" he was speaking so passionately about. He listened closely, straining to hear anything over the raging storm, but couldn't pick up on the particular sound L was apparently hearing.

"I don't hear anything," Light announced after a few moments.

L glanced over at him.

"Really? You can't hear it?" he asked, almost sounding as if he'd honestly expected Light to be able to hear it. "It's been ringing nonstop all day. It's very distracting. I wonder if it's a church; maybe a wedding, or perhaps a..." he slowly trailed off.

Light wondered why L hadn't said the last part. L was certainly never one to hold his tongue, speaking whatever was honestly on his mind when he chose to, no matter what the situation or circumstance. So why had he just trailed off like that? What was he going to say?

Light inwardly gasped. He had a grim feeling of what L had thought about saying out loud.

A _funeral_. He was going to say that he thought the bell could have been coming from a church holding a funeral. Could he have been alluding to the thought of himself dying soon, or worse yet, today? Light mentally shook his head, trying to deny that possibility.

 _There's something_ very _wrong with him today,_ he thought. _Maybe we can talk about it when we get back into the building away from all this rain._

"What are you getting at, Ryūzaki?" he asked confusedly, voicing his thoughts. "Come on, cut it out. Let's get back inside."

He wasn't showing it, but he was beginning to get goosebumps from the cold walls of rain that made his clothing stick to his skin.

L stared at Light for a second or two before dropping his gaze to the ground and looking away from him.

"I'm sorry," he apologized just above a whisper. "Nothing I say makes any sense, anyway. If I were you, I wouldn't believe any of it."

Light slightly tilted his head to the side as he stared at L in confoundment. _That's not true, L,_ he thought sadly. _A lot of what you say to me makes perfect sense. You just don't realize that._

Betraying his thoughts, Light just smirked and said, "You know, you're totally right. Honestly, most of the things you say sound like complete nonsense. There'd be no end to my troubles if I actually took you seriously all the time. I probably know that better than anyone."

L, still looking away, softly replied, "Yes. I could say that's a fair assessment, but... I could say the same about you."

Light frowned, still not knowing where he was going with this. "Hm? What's that supposed to mean?"

L slowly looked over at him, his hands still in his pockets. "Tell me, Light; from the moment you were born, has there ever been a point where you've actually told the truth?"

Light just stared back at him incredulously. Was he heading in a philosophical direction with this or was this just an honest question? He decided to ask.

"Where's this coming from, Ryūzaki? I do admit; I stretch the truth here and there. However, find me one person in this world who's never had to tell a lie. It wouldn't be easy. Human beings just... aren't made to be perfect like that. Everybody lies from time to time. Even so, I've always made a conscious effort to be careful not to tell a lie that could hurt others. That's my answer."

Even now, Light wasn't being truthful. He honestly _did_ try not to tell any harmful lies, but ever since becoming Kira that had been harder and harder to do.

He hated it. He hated living a life built on dishonesty and untrustworthiness, and he would do anything to get his old life back.

But part of him didn't want to. It was the part of him that craved power, the part that desired absolute submission from everyone in the world who he would soon rule over as God. It was the part that had encouraged him to pick up that Death Note and begin his quest to shape the new world as he saw fit.

It was also the part that wanted L dead. If it weren't for the recognition of this desire within his Kira self and his realization that he'd come to care for this odd detective, he probably would have gone ahead and done it by now. He truly despised this dual lifestyle and wished with all of his being that he could choose one over the other.

But which side would come out on top if he did? Light or Kira?

"I had a feeling you'd say something like that," L's soft, monotone voice suddenly pulled Light away from his own thoughts and back to the present.

He returned his eyes to the detective, who was looking off to the side. It almost seemed as if he were trying to avoid Light's gaze. The teen continued to stare at him expectantly, waiting for him to say something else. He looked like he wanted to, but the words just wouldn't come out.

Eventually, after a few moments of silence, L suggested, "Let's go back inside. We're both drenched."

The detective nodded toward the door to emphasize his point and Light was more than happy to comply, following L as he started to head back in.

"Yeah," he agreed with a small grin.

He made himself a promise to find out what was wrong with L once they were back inside. One way or another, he would get the man to open up to him. He wasn't exactly sure how he was going to accomplish that, but he would do it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I originally planned for this chapter to be longer than just the rooftop scene and to go into where they're drying off inside, but I felt it would work better if I divided them up into two separate chapters. Oh, I almost forgot: the title of this story comes from the novel of the same title by Ernest Hemingway, though I've never actually read it or seen the adapted film in its entirety before. I do like the song by Metallica, though...


	2. The Struggle Within

Once inside, Light was sitting on the steps, drying himself off from the downpour. He had his wet shoes off and was sweeping a towel through his hair when L walked back in with a towel of his own over his head.

"Well, that was certainly an unpleasant outing," he announced to the teen.

Light rolled his eyes in annoyance. "It's your own fault," he chastised as he continued drying his hair quite fervently. "I mean, what did you expect?"

L hung his head in what appeared to be shame. "You're right. Sorry," he apologized.

Light immediately regretted phrasing it like that. L was already feeling down today and the last thing he wanted to do was make him feel worse. He was so wrapped up in his own thoughts that he didn't notice L walk down the stairs and kneel in front of him. He gasped when he felt something take hold of his foot and looked down to see L grasping it.

"What are you doing?!" he exclaimed in shock.

"I thought I might help you out," L explained. "You were busy wiping yourself off, anyway."

"Look, i-it's fine. You don't have to do that," Light insisted.

It wasn't that he didn't _want_ L to dry his feet off for him, it was just that he was more than capable of doing it himself. He didn't want to be doted on like some child!

"I can give you a massage, as well," pressed L. "It's the least I can do to atone for my sins. I'm actually pretty good at this."

Knowing L wasn't going to take "no" for an answer, Light sighed and decided to oblige him. "Fine," he rolled his eyes, "do what you want."

Besides, he actually _was_ kind of interested in a massage from the other man. He hadn't known he was good at giving them, and now that he did, his curiosity was piqued.

"All right," L confirmed as he put the towel he was holding in one hand on the sole of Light's foot while holding the appendage in place with his other hand.

He pressed hard up into the arch and Light grunted in discomfort.

"Hey!" he winced.

"You'll get used to it," L assured as he continued to work his foot.

Within about a minute, Light realized that L was right. It felt very good. No, it felt _great_. He hadn't even realized how tense his feet had been before L started working on them.

His soft, slender hands pressed and rubbed the sole of Light's foot, easing the tenseness away from it as he continued the massage. Light watched L as he worked, like he was almost enjoying doing this for him. He didn't have a problem with it, but why did it seem like he was doing this because it would be the last time he would ever see him?

These worrisome thoughts soon left his mind as L began to slightly increase the pressure of his hand. Light gave a small smile, making sure L wouldn't notice. He honestly wouldn't have minded him doing this for him more often if L agreed to it.

His thoughts were interrupted when he felt something wet and cool hit his foot. He glanced down to see small droplets of water rolling down the long, wild strands of L's dark hair and land on him. He grabbed the towel next to him and reached forward to gently dry L's hair.

"Here, you're still soaked," he told him as he wiped his bangs with the towel.

L momentarily paused in his task to glance up at Light as if wanting to say something, but just looked back down at Light's foot and continued massaging it. "I'm sorry," he quietly apologized.

Light frowned. _Please, stop apologizing,_ he mentally begged. _You have nothing to be sorry for..._

He didn't know what was happening to him. One moment, he was looking for L with the intent to make sure he didn't try anything to apprehend him as Kira, and the next, he was genuinely feeling sorry for the man. It just didn't make sense. He wanted to tell L about his feelings for him, but-

"Oh, yes he does," a voice suddenly sneered.

Light gasped and looked to his left, nearly jumping at the sight of what - or rather, _who_ \- was sitting next to him. The person raised his head from its bowed position and looked directly into Light's eyes. Light was shocked to see that this person's eyes were pure red. He also noticed that this person's hair was the same color.

But the most disturbing thing was the fact that, besides the eye and hair color, this person looked _exactly_ like him, like a twin separated from him at birth.

 _Oh... Oh my God..._ Light thought.

"Miss me, Light?" the person asked with a mischievous smile.

Light gulped, voice just barely above a whisper. "W-Who are you?"

"Aw, you know who I am, Light!" the person beside him chuckled. "Come on; think hard. Who does the world know you as?"

Light gasped, not wanting to believe what this person was saying to him right now. This _had_ to be a mirage or something.

Leaning forward ever so slightly, he whispered, "K-Kira?"

The person's lips slowly turned upwards into a very dangerous-looking smile. "Bingo," he said.

"B-But how... why...?" Light stuttered.

This was impossible. _How_ was this person who called himself "Kira," who looked almost exactly like him and seemed to already know everything about him, actually sitting right next to him and physically _speaking_ to him?! It just... this just didn't make any sense...

Kira chuckled, shaking his head and sighing as he glanced down at L, who was now drying and massaging his feet. Light happened to notice this and saw that L was no longer tending to him, but rather this person next to him. This... _Kira_...

"He looks so pathetic, kneeling down at my feet," Kira commented. "What a worthless human being."

Light gasped in shock. "N-No... no, Kira, he isn't!" he defended the detective. "He's just... he's just having a tough time right now with something..."

Kira scoffed, looking from L over to Light. He regarded him incredulously as he leaned back upon the steps on his elbows. "What, you're making _excuses_ for him now, Light?"

"What? N-No, Kira, I'm-!" Light tried to argue but was quickly cut off by the other man.

"Light," Kira glared at him, "don't lie to me. I know you're making excuses for him because of your feelings towards him. Face it, Light; you _love_ him."

He spat out that last part of the sentence as if it were poison on the tip of his tongue.

Light was taken aback. "Wh-What?"

"It's the truth and you know it, Light," Kira shook his head. "You've gotten _soft_. What happened to your plans to kill him? What about the new world? Don't you care about any of that anymore? Or have you just decided to roll over and become L's little _pet_?"

Light just stared at Kira, slack jawed. _He's... no, he's wrong! I still want a new world! But, L..._

He gazed down at L, who was silently and fervently tending to Kira's feet. His head was bowed, damp bangs hanging low in front of his face and obscuring most of it from Light's view.

 _L,_ he thought, _can't you hear us?_

"Light," Kira's rough voice suddenly captured his attention once more, "just let him go. Sit back and relax. By the end of the night, he'll be dead, anyway."

He smiled cruelly down at L, ignoring the shocked expression of pure horror on Light's face.

"Kira... what are you saying?" Light asked him slowly.

"I'm saying that it's pointless to hold on to him any longer," Kira replied coolly. "Trust me, Light; he'll be dead before midnight. I'm trying to help you out here."

 _Help me out?_ Light thought incredulously. _How is telling me to just sit back and watch L die helping me in_ any _possible way?_

"You can trust me, Light," he felt a hand on his shoulder. "I'm looking out for your best interests, whether you like it or not. I'm part of you, Light. I _am_ you."

Light raised his head to ask Kira just what he was talking about when he realized that he was no longer there. Startled, he looked down at L to see that he was still massaging his feet and had moved onto the other one he hadn't gotten yet.

_What... What just happened? Where did he go? Wasn't he just here a second ago? And what did he mean by L being dead before midnight tonight?_

Light wished he had more time to think, more time to consider every variable and work it out somewhere quiet like the math problems he always had for homework. But that was a luxury he didn't have right now. Time, sadly, was not on his side.

A sigh escaped Light's mouth and he closed his eyes in both pleasure and thought as L massaged his left foot. He tried to decide on what he was going to do next, but unfortunately, the blissful kneading of his foot prevented him from thinking about much at all. He was forced to forego any deep thinking for the moment and just enjoy L's skilled hands.

He glanced down at L as he continued the soothing massage, carefully rolling and stroking the tense flesh between his hands. Light wondered just where he'd learned to do this in the first place.

 _I should ask him sometime..._ he began to think before quickly shaking his head. He needed to concentrate on forming a plan, on deciding what he was going to-

L suddenly broke the silence between the two of them with a soft inquiry. "It'll be lonely, won't it?"

Light's eyebrows rose and he looked down at the detective, confused at his words. "Hm?"

L looked directly into Light's brown eyes, his bangs hiding one of his own black ones from view. "You and I will be parting ways soon," he stated quietly.

Light just gazed down at him incredulously, not sure of what he was saying. _He sounds so... sad._

Light wished he could do something, _anything_ to make L feel better, but he wasn't even sure where to begin. He swallowed and glanced down at the man, anxiously waiting for him to extrapolate upon his words.

But he didn't. He just looked up at Light almost expectantly, seeming to want _him_ to say something. It didn't happen.

The silence soon became uncomfortable for both speakers. They both had something to say, but each wanted the other to talk first before they said it. Neither of them said _anything_ , though.

It was like two similar things coming together and colliding so hard that they just cancelled each other out and disappeared from existence as if they'd never even been there in the first place. The silence that came afterwards was much like the silence between Light and L right now. Eventually, after realizing that nothing was going to be said, L slowly stood up and made his way up the steps, carrying his damp towel with him.

Light glanced over his shoulder to see the detective begin walking away from him. "Where are you going?" he asked curiously.

He hoped it didn't come off as demanding, because that was _far_ from how he wanted it to sound. He just wanted to know where he was going to be.

L paused in his footsteps and glanced back at Light, who was still sitting where he'd left him. "Oh, nowhere really," L shrugged. "Just back to my room, I suppose. I'll be there for the rest of the night, should you need anything."

Light opened his mouth to say something, but decided against it and closed it. He looked away, slightly embarrassed at his lack of being able to find the words he wanted to say. He couldn't even acknowledge the man's simple statement.

L nodded to his friend, understanding that their talk was basically over and began the walk back to his room.

When L was gone, Light looked down at his feet, unsure of what to do next. Bringing his hands up to his hair, he gripped it in both hands and pulled harshly, not caring about the pain he was currently bringing upon himself. He felt numb and he needed to feel something, _anything_ other than just the... nothingness that was there.

"That looks rather painful, Light," he heard Kira chuckle behind him. "You sure you want to do that?"

Light glanced up at him before returning his gaze to the steps. "Why do you care?"

"Oh, come on now, Light," Kira sat down next to him. "Don't make me out to be some heartless bastard or something like that. I _do_ care about you, you know. If I didn't, I wouldn't have told you about L's impending death, now would I?"

"Don't listen to him, Light," another voice - one that admittedly sounded more like his own than Kira's - reached Light's ears and he immediately swiveled his head to the right to see another person coming his way. "Do what you believe is right, not what _he_ wants you to do."

"W-Who are you?" Light questioned the second person, standing up.

The person stopped a few feet in front of him and Light was shocked to see that this person looked _exactly_ like him except for the fact that he was wearing Light's school uniform. "I'm your soul, Light. I'm who you were before you picked up that Death Note and who you briefly were when you gave up ownership of it several months ago."

"Oh, not _you_ ," Kira gritted through his teeth as he, too rose to his feet.

Light looked between the two of them, clearly confused. "What... What's going on here?" he asked, not really caring who he got a response from.

"You're at a crossroads, Light," his soul informed him, prompting him to glance in his direction and regard him incredulously as he spoke. "You're at a point where you need to make a decision, and fast. It will affect you for the rest of your life, and depending on what you choose, the outcome will either be positive or negative."

"Choice?" Light shook his head in confusion. "What... What choice? What are you talking about?"

His soul took a step closer.

"You need to decide whether or not to save L," he explained. "If you choose to save him, then Kira will disappear forever and L will live; however, you'll be giving up the possibility of a new world in the process. If you choose to let him die, though, you'll have your new world and all that comes with it; but I will fade away and you will simply lose yourself to Kira. You will _become_ Kira, and after that point, Light Yagami will be no more."

Light's eyes widened and he glanced back at Kira, who rolled his eyes and extended his hand toward him.

"Light, this is pointless," he reasoned. "Come on, take my hand, and together, we'll create the new world that you've wanted since you picked up that notebook and realized just how essential it was in cleansing this planet of all those unfit to live on it."

Light recalled that day nearly a year ago, the day when he'd killed those two men with the notebook and how... _empowered_ he'd felt. They had been mere test subjects for him to discover whether the Death Note was just a fake or an actual supernatural anomaly that could really kill a person just by having their name written into it. Not long afterward, he'd decided that he desired to become the god of a new world where only good people lived and the evil would be swiftly punished.

"Is that what you want, Light?" his soul argued, taking a step closer. "Is that what you _really_ want? A society ruled by violence and fear where those who are deemed 'unfit' to live on Earth are thoughtlessly judged and killed without a proper trial? Is that what _L_ would want, Light?"

Light glanced at his soul. No, that... that _wouldn't_ be what L would want. L believed in the justice system, no matter how flawed or corrupted it could sometimes be. He believed that people were innocent until proven guilty in a court of law, that a judge and a jury would ultimately decide their fate in the end. He believed that someone should only be placed under arrest and convicted with solid, concrete proof against their case to clearly determine that they were, in fact, guilty of their crimes. He would _never_ condemn the use of anything like the Death Note here on Earth, no matter how noble or justified the cause for using it was.

"Light, don't listen to him," Kira narrowed his eyes at Light's soul, stepping closer to Light. "He's trying to deter you from becoming the god that we both know you could be if you decide to go through with your original plans. Think about the _power_ , Light; how powerful you'll be with no one to stop you from ruling as the creator of a brand new world!"

Glancing back at Kira, Light envisioned himself in that very position. He pictured himself seated upon a magnificent throne, Death Note in one hand and a pen in the other. Millions upon millions bowed down at his feet and the entire world accepted his rule without debate or argument. The world was free of people who wished to cause anyone else harm or negatively impact the lives of others; the ones who _deserved_ to live here on Earth.

"What about L, Light? Don't you care for him?" Light's soul took another step and slowly extended his hand. "Light, look deep within yourself. Search your feelings for him; you _love_ him, Light. You _know_ you do. Why would you kill the one you love?"

And it was true; Light _did_ love L. It was an undeniable, irrefutable fact, one that he couldn't have tried to dispute even if he wanted to. He had loved him for some time now, and even if he was only now admitting what he really felt for the other man, he knew it to be one hundred percent valid.

"He's just _one_ guy, Light!" Kira took another step toward him, beginning to close the distance in between the two of them. "As the god of the new world, you'll be able to have whoever you want! You don't want to throw all that away just for one arrogant detective, do you?"

Well... that _would_ be pretty selfish of him. And L _was_ a little arrogant...

"Tell me this, Light; would you really want to live in a world without L?" Light's soul inquired. "Even if you had everything you could ever want at your disposal and the power to control the entire planet in the palm of your hand, would it really be worth it without L?"

Light gasped and looked directly into the eyes of his soul, own eyes going wide. He now understood what his soul was saying.

How could he have possibly been so selfish so as to risk L's life for... what? World domination? A totalitarian dictatorship in which billions lived under the rule of a homicidal maniac with the power to kill almost anyone he wished?

"Hey, shut up!" Kira barked, pointing an accusing finger at Light's soul.

But Light ignored him and began walking toward his soul. He saw a small smile find its way onto his soul's face, making him feel almost as if he were staring at his own reflection in a mirror.

"Come with me, Light," he gently coaxed him. "Just take my hand."

"No!" he heard Kira growl behind him. "Light, stop! Think about the consequences! What if he turns you in for mass murder, huh? What are you gonna do then? Rot in a prison cell for the rest of your life? Why risk it?!"

Light paid him no mind, though; Kira was just being irrational at this point, spitting out whatever came to the top of his head in an attempt to get Light back on his side. But Light wasn't falling for it. His love for L and the desire for his soul back was much too strong for the hatred and maliciousness of Kira.

His soul remained before him, smile still on his face and hand still outstretched. "Come on, Light; you're almost there. Just a few more steps."

" _Light, stop_!" Kira yelled.

Light reached his hand out, slowly extending it to that of his soul. But he needed to be sure of one thing before he made this decision. It was the one thing that would either make or break his resolve.

"Will... Will he be all right?" he asked softly. "He'll be... alive and well?"

The other nodded. "I give you my word, Light."

With that, Light crossed the remaining distance between him and his soul to firmly grasp his hand. He was suddenly enveloped in a brightness unlike any he'd ever encountered in sheer radiance. He had to cover his eyes with a hand, but he could just barely see the full smile his soul was giving him.

"I'm proud of you, Light," he praised him. "You made the right choice."

" _NO_!" a sharp cry suddenly interrupted the rather delicate moment.

Light glanced over his shoulder to see a furious-looking Kira glaring straight at him. He almost appeared as if he wanted to kill him.

"How _could_ you, Light?!" he howled. "After all you did with that Death Note, after how far you've gotten... you're just going to give it all up now? And for what; some pathetic detective?! You're _weak_ , Light! You'll never be as strong as you could've been with me!"

Light turned to fully face him, standing his ground. "No, Kira," he said softly, slowly shaking his head. " _You're_ the pathetic one. _You_ are the one who's weak. I'm taking back my life now and I don't want you in it any longer. Goodbye, Kira."

Kira's eyes widened and his jaw dropped as cracks began to form all over his body, like a piece of glass that had been badly damaged and was about to shatter. And that was just what happened to Kira; as soon as Light had spoken those final words to him, he shattered. Broke into a thousand pieces. He had but a second to cry out before he disintegrated into a thousand tiny shards that could never, _ever_ be put back together again.

Feeling as if a hundred pounds had been lifted from his shoulders, Light turned to ask his soul one last question before noticing that he was no longer there. Whipping his head around, he also saw that neither Kira nor the remaining shards of him were there, either. Looking all around, he suddenly realized that everything that had just transpired between him, his soul and Kira had all been in his head.

Supplied with this knowledge... he wasn't really sure what to feel. Relief? Confusion? Happiness? Anxiety?

He just smiled to himself, shaking his head. He wasn't really sure right now, but he could figure it out later. Even though he could have bathed for weeks on end in the sheer amount of pure elation and acute clarity he was currently experiencing, however, he was also feeling quite drained; and understandably so.

He had just fought a war with himself; a war for his _mind_. In the end, his soul had won out and Kira had been destroyed. It had been a challenging ordeal, but he was now back in control. He would never be able to create a new world now, but... well, L was worth it.

At the thought of that name, he gasped, eyes widening to almost comic proportions. _L_.

He had almost completely forgotten about him! He needed to find him. He needed to tell him how much he loved him and just how much he really meant to him.

Regardless of whether L would be fine or not, he wasn't going to take any chances. He'd come too far and had been through too much to just haphazardly take his time and risk the possibility of something bad happening to him that could have easily been avoided on his part.

Picking up his wet shoes in one hand and the damp towel in the other, Light ran up the stairs barefoot and hurried off to find someone that he desperately needed to talk to.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What's a good fic without a little drama and suspense, huh? Ha ha ha.


	3. Give and Take

Light halted as he ran through the metal door into the server room, doubling over and gasping for breath as it closed behind him. He'd run nonstop all the way from where he'd been from coming in from the storm to here and was now desperately trying to regain control of his respiration.

Panting and coughing a little, his breathing slowly returned to normal and he stood up straight to call out for the one person he needed to see. Though, technically, who he wanted to talk to wasn't actually a "person."

"Rem!" he called out, loud enough to be heard over the whirring and mechanical sounds of the electronics in the small room but quiet enough so as not to draw attention to him from any of the other task force members in the building. He doubted anyone would hear him even if he shouted at the top of his lungs in here, but he didn't want to take any unnecessary chances.

Within a few moments, the female Shinigami materialized into the room through the ceiling and gradually floated down before the human boy, only a few feet away from him. He'd told her a few months ago that this would be their meeting place if they ever needed to discuss something, and so far this was the only time that he'd actually used it for that purpose. Rem gazed into Light's brown eyes with her own yellow ones, scrutinizing them for any hints or allusions as to what he wanted to talk about.

"Yes, Light Yagami?" she asked in her deep voice.

"Rem, there's... there's something I need to talk to you about," Light confessed.

"Yes, I supposed that was why you wanted to meet with me here," she nodded. "What do you wish to discuss?"

Light swallowed hard, not really sure how to phrase what he wanted to say to the Shinigami. "Look, Rem, do you remember that deal we made in my room a few months ago?"

"Yes. You said you wished for me to kill L for you, and in return, you would keep Misa safe. I also said that if any harm were to come to Misa that I would write your name into my Death Note."

Light nodded. "Yeah, that was basically what we talked about. Well, about that deal..." he trailed off, looking away and rubbing the back of his neck, a small blush on his face.

"Yes?" Rem interjected after a few moments of silence.

Light sighed and returned his gaze to Rem's eyes. "Look, Rem, I don't really know any other way to say this, but... the deal's off."

Rem's jaw dropped and her eyes widened upon hearing this. She gazed at him incredulously as she asked, "What do you mean, Light Yagami?"

"I'm asking you not to kill L, Rem," Light simplified. "I can't really explain why, but basically, what I'm saying is that I don't need your help anymore. You can go back to Misa, if you want to."

Rem just stared back at him, shocked to hear Light suddenly giving up on his plans for L. Wasn't this what he wanted all along? To remove the greatest obstacle in his path of becoming God? Well, as long as Misa wasn't involved in this, it didn't really matter to her what he did.

"I see," she finally acknowledged him. "What will become of Misa now?"

"I won't need her help anymore, either," Light shook his head with a small smile. "As far as I'm concerned, she can do whatever she likes."

"What about your relationship with her, though?" Rem added. "Aren't you her lover?"

"No, that was completely one-sided," Light informed her resolutely. "I just used her for her Shinigami eyes to discover L's real name. If she asks about me, just tell her that we're done."

Still in awe about Light's decision to abstain from killing L, Rem just shrugged. "As long as Misa isn't involved, your plans don't concern me."

"Oh, one last thing," Light held his hand up. "I want you to take my notebook with you. Keep it, destroy it, take it back to the Shinigami Realm, I don't care what you do with it. Just... whatever you do, keep it away from me."

Rem tilted her head slightly to the side. "You no longer wish to use it?"

"No," Light shook his head. "I don't have any use for it anymore."

"As you wish, Light Yagami," Rem turned to leave. "Farewell."

"Rem?" Light suddenly spoke up. "Yes?" she stopped and glanced to the side to meet his eyes.

"For what it's worth, I'm sorry for putting Misa in harm's way and using her the way I did. I hope she finds someone who truly loves her and has a good life."

Rem simply blinked, nodded, and materialized through the wall to leave the server room. Light had a feeling that he wouldn't see Rem again, but he wasn't too worried about it. Because of his actions toward Misa and personality as Kira, she probably didn't like him very much to begin with. It was probably better like this, anyway.

He surprised even himself at what he'd said about Misa, though. He was just now realizing how guilty he truly felt for using her the way he did like some mindless puppet to help him achieve his goals.

She may have been annoying and fairly stupid compared to himself, but even she didn't deserve the kind of treatment he gave her. He honestly did hope she had a good life, though, even if he had indirectly quartered it.

Now that Rem was gone and he was all alone, however, Light suddenly realized just how cold it was in here. The damp clothes sticking to his body and the metal floor under his bare feet only made it worse. Slightly shivering and rubbing his upper arms, he opened the door and left the server room.

* * *

Rem was still in disbelief as she floated down the hall with Light's Death Note.

 _When did he decide all of this?_ she pondered. _Didn't he want me to kill L for him?_

She hated to admit it, but Light had thoroughly surprised her today with his change of heart. Maybe he wasn't the callous, uncaring human she'd thought him out to be.

After all, he'd asked her to take back the Death Note and assured her that Misa would no longer be involved in his plans. What had inspired him to suddenly alter his scheme to get rid of the meddlesome detective?

Her thoughts swirled wildly around her head as she floated down the hallways of the building. She was in the middle of pondering Light's reasoning when she recognized one of the doors as L's and stopped before it.

She wasn't sure why, but she materialized only partly through the door so she could look inside. The man's back was to her and he was curled up in a chair, looking out through the window of his room and watching the storm.

She quietly gasped when she looked at his lifespan and noticed that it was much larger than it had been recently. In fact, he was supposed to die on this very day: November 5, 2004! She wasn't sure how or the exact time, but something was supposed to happen that would have caused his death.

She was about to consider how this had happened when the answer suddenly hit her like a runaway freight train: Light.

He'd asked her not to kill L and to take his Death Note with her, and she'd agreed to both. The only way she knew of to lengthen someone's lifespan was for a Shinigami to write down the name of someone who was going to kill the victim that they favored, but the Shinigami who did so would die themselves. However, by not using the power of the Death Note, she had saved not only L, but her own life, as well. She couldn't help but smile to herself as she slipped out of the room and continued down the hallway.

 _Leave it to Light Yagami to find a loophole in the Death Note rules,_ she thought.

* * *

Light straightened out his hair as he walked down the hallway to L's room. It was still a bit frizzy from the shower he'd taken about ten minutes ago and he was doing his best to try and keep it in order.

He'd also changed out of his wet clothes into a green button-down dress shirt, beige dress pants, boxers, black socks, and tennis shoes. He didn't particularly care about his fashion statement, but he always tried to dress nicely, no matter what the occasion.

He stopped in front of L's door and did one last run-over of his outfit, smoothing out any visible wrinkles and adjusting the shirt and pants so they fit more comfortably on him. He couldn't believe he was really about to do this, and the combination of both excitement and anxiety was nearly driving him mad. Taking a deep breath, he straightened his posture and knocked lightly on the door.

"Ryūzaki?" he softly called out.

There was a moment of silence before a monotone voice responded from behind the door. "Yes, Light?"

"Would you mind if I came in to talk to you about something for a bit?" he asked tentatively.

"No, I suppose not. Come in, the door's unlocked."

Light nodded to himself and opened the door to L's room, gently closing it behind him as he entered the suite.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I may be pushing the Death Note rules a bit with how Rem technically saved L, but if you think about it, the numbers above someone's head represent when they're supposed to die. If something were to happen that saved the person from their predetermined death, wouldn't their lifespan increase and grant them a longer life? I don't know, just a theory...


	4. Eye of the Storm

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: A brief lime in this one.

When Light stepped into the living area of L's suite after leaving his shoes by the door, one of the first things he noticed was that the space was completely dark. There wasn't a single light turned on, and the only visible source of illumination was the large window that L was looking out of. Because of the time of day and the bad weather, however, that wasn't much, either.

Light noticed that the man was curled up in a chair facing the window, his back to him. He didn't move an inch, even as Light walked up behind him. Stopping a few respectable feet behind him, he asked, "Ryūzaki? What are you doing?"

There was a moment's pause. "Just watching the storm," he answered, still looking straight ahead. "By the way, you can just call me 'L' when we're in here. No need to use my alias when we're alone in a place like this."

"Oh, okay. Well, _L_ , could we maybe talk?"

Another moment's pause. "Yes."

L unfolded himself from the chair and stood up to face his visitor. Light noticed a state of mind that he'd only seen a few times on the man's features: confusion. Apparently, the answer to whatever question he'd been thinking about before Light came in had successfully evaded him. Familiar with how the man's mind worked, however, Light was sure he would figure it out sooner rather than later.

"Before we begin, would you care for some hot chocolate?" L piped up.

"Huh?" Light snapped back to reality. "Oh, uh... yeah, sure."

L nodded and walked into the kitchen, still talking as he flipped on the light and rummaged through the cabinets. "Why don't you have a seat while I make it for us?" he offered.

"Okay," Light complied.

Light found a seat on the couch and, upon noticing a lamp next to him, switched it on for some illumination in the place. He glanced into the kitchen where L was starting to get the hot water ready. "No offense or anything, but wouldn't Watari usually do this for you?"

"Oh, none taken," L responded from the kitchen. "And yes, normally he would, but I gave him the day off. That was along with everyone else in the task force today."

"Ah," Light nodded.

"Why, are you worried I'll mess it up?" L uncharacteristically joked.

Light laughed. "No, it's just that I'm used to seeing him doting on you, is all."

"Yes, well I suppose that's a justified reason."

Light remained silent as he watched L prepare their hot chocolate from his vantage point in the living space. Less than ten minutes later, the detective came forward with two steaming mugs of hot water, leaving one on the glass table and handing the other to his guest. Light thanked him as he walked back into the kitchen. He soon returned with several items in his hands, dumping them haphazardly onto the table. Light looked down and saw an assortment of objects before him: a box containing packets of cocoa powder, two metal tablespoons, a can of whipped cream, a bag of mini-marshmallows, and about a dozen wrapped sugar cubes.

Light raised his eyebrows at the cavity-inducing sight before him. _Well, this_ is _L we're talking about here,_ he thought. _Still, though, all that just for hot chocolate?!_

L sat down on the loveseat across from Light on the other side of the table, curling up into his preferred position; knees drawn up to his chest and one arm hugging them close to his body as he used the other to reach for the table. He picked up the box of mixing powder and offered it to Light, who took one and thanked him once more. L set the box back on the table and retrieved three packets from it while Light carefully tore his open and emptied it into the mug. He took a spoon and began mixing it while L dumped all three of his packets into his own mug.

Light shook his head and couldn't help but smile as he stirred the powdery mixture around. _He just took three cups' worth of hot chocolate mix and put it all into one mug!_ he thought incredulously.

...Once again, though, this _was_ L.

L soon offered Light the marshmallows and whipped cream, to which he accepted both. However, like most other people who enjoyed hot chocolate, he declined the sugar cubes. L just shrugged and added two of them to his drink, which already contained three whole packets of cocoa powder, about two dozen marshmallows, and a small mountain of whipped cream. Light looked at his own mug and saw almost a dozen marshmallows and a dollop of whipped cream floating in it. If L were to drink it, he would probably spit it out and accuse Light of trying to poison him with something so under-sweetened.

Light chuckled to himself at that thought and brought the steaming mug to his mouth. Sipping carefully, he allowed the hot, sweet liquid to slide down his throat as L took a sip of his own.

The detective licked his lips. " _De_ licious!" L remarked.

Light chuckled and took another sip. "Yeah, for you, maybe," he rolled his eyes.

"Some people just don't care for sweet things," L shrugged.

Light raised his eyebrows. "No, this is sweet," he pointed to his own mug and then pointed to L's. " _That_ is a diabetic's worst nightmare."

L just said to him deadpanned, "Well, I'm not a diabetic."

"Keep up that kind of diet and you might end up being one soon!" Light laughed.

L scoffed before taking another sip. "Says you," he muttered. "Though this discussion about sweets and my diet is rather entertaining," he met Light's eyes, "I can't help but feel that you wanted to talk about something more... pressing."

"Right," Light sighed as he set his mug down on the table. He had almost hoped to delay what he wanted to actually talk about for a bit longer, but that obviously wasn't going to happen now. He folded his hands and slightly leaned forward. "L, I wanted to talk to you about our relationship."

L was about to take another sip of his "sweetened" drink when he heard the outline of the discussion topic. He lowered the mug from his lips and met Light's gaze.

"Our relationship?" he asked.

"Yes," Light nodded, "our relationship."

L was somewhat confused by the vagueness of Light's words. "In which sense?"

"You know, how you and I interact and behave around each other," Light cleared it up.

"Oh," L looked down at his feet before returning his focus to Light. "All right. What about our relationship?"

"Well, we've known each other for a while now, right?" Light started.

"I suppose so," L agreed. "It's been about seven months since we first met."

"Would you say that you know me pretty well?"

"Basically, yes. At least when it comes to your personality, mannerisms, physical traits, and interests."

"I'm sure there's a lot I still don't know about you yet, L, but I believe it's safe to say that I know you pretty well, too."

"In a way, yes."

"You told me a while back that I was your first friend, correct?"

L thought for a moment, bringing his thumb to his lips. "Yes," he confirmed, "I recall that statement."

"Well, to be honest, L, I've had a lot of friends in my life, but I don't think I can count any of them as _actual_ friends. You're the first person I've ever met whom I could actually relate to on so many levels. In a weird sort of way, you're kind of my first friend, too."

L furrowed his brow, not quite sure where Light was headed with this. He decided to ask. "Light, are you going somewhere with-?" he began.

"Hold on, L," Light cut him off with a raised hand. "I'll get to that in a bit, okay? What I was going to say is that we're both friends, and although we know each other pretty well at this point, I think there are still some things we haven't covered yet."

L was beginning to feel both slightly nervous and anxious at Light's words. Now, he suddenly wasn't so sure if he should have invited him in to talk. Still, he obliged him to continue. "Like what?" he swallowed.

"Well, for instance..." Light blushed, rubbing the back of his neck as he averted L's gaze. After a few moments, he looked back up at the other man. "Who we're interested in."

L's eyes widened and his lips parted ever so slightly in obvious surprise. "I-Interested in?" he blushed.

Light couldn't help but give a small smirk. He'd never seen L blush before and was excited to be the thing that made it happen. "Yes," he nodded. "Who we like."

L had an idea of where Light was headed with this, but he wasn't completely sure and wanted a clearer perception before the conversation went any further. "What do you mean, 'like?'"

Light rolled his eyes and sighed. If L didn't get the hint after this, then his next plan was to draw him a damn picture! "Who we're in love with," he pronounced each word slowly.

L's eyes practically bugged out of their skull and he had to look away from Light to try and hide his blush. He gripped the porcelain mug in his hand as if his life depended on it. _Love?_ he thought. _What does_ that _have to do with anything?_

Light smirked. _Bingo!_ he thought excitedly. _Looks like he got the hint, all right._

L slowly met Light's gaze, his usually pale features colored with a bright shade of red. "W-Why does it matter?" L asked tentatively.

Light shrugged. "I'm just curious, that's all."

L slightly narrowed his eyes in disbelief. "You seem very persistent about this, Light."

"I'm just asking!" Light chuckled. "Come on, what's the harm in that?"

L rolled his eyes, muttering, "None really, I suppose..."

Light heard that bit and smirked. "See? Now, come on; tell me who you like and then I'll tell you!"

L shook his head, still unsure of this. " _You_ tell _me_ first, and then I'll tell you." He couldn't help but feel that this was something teenage girls did for fun in their spare time, not grown men.

Light just rolled his eyes and sighed. "All right, all right. Fine, I'll go first. I'm not really sure how to say this, but..." he slightly trailed off before gazing directly into L's eyes and saying the words he'd wanted to say for a long time now. "L, I'm in love with you."

L just blinked.

He continued staring across the table at Light, not moving an inch or making a sound as if he hadn't heard the boy confess his love for him. He gulped, took a long sip of his hot chocolate, and just continued staring at Light. His mouth opened and closed a few times, trying to say something but failing to do so. Finally, he found the words.

"Y-You are?" he asked.

Light nodded. "Yes, L; I am, and I have been for quite some time now."

L's eyes widened and he averted Light's gaze, the blush across his cheeks becoming almost fiery hot. _How... How can this be?_ he pondered. _How could_ anyone _, especially someone as beautiful as Light Yagami, be in love with someone like_ me _? It has to be some kind of a trick..._

But... what if it wasn't a trick? What if someone actually cared for him and wanted to share their life with him? What if he could experience such a powerful emotion with someone who actually deemed him worthy of such a gift?

The only relationship he'd ever had was with Watari, who essentially became his father figure after the deaths of his parents. But that wasn't the kind of relationship Light was suggesting to him. He wanted to be his _lover_ , the most intimate position anyone could ever have with another person in any sort of interaction.

He was floored. He just couldn't comprehend the possibility of another human being actually wanting to be with him in a loving relationship. He never had, really. But if what Light was saying was true...

"L?" Light softly called his name, breaking him free of his self-demeaning thoughts.

L looked back up at Light and saw an expression of both concern and anxiety on his features. He noticed that one of his hands was stretched across the table, and when he followed it with his eyes, he was shocked to discover that it was resting atop his own, the thumb gently rubbing small circles into it. Had he really been that deep in his thoughts?

 _His hand feels warm..._ the detective thought as he looked perplexedly from his hand to Light. He could almost hear his own heart pounding in his ears. _I... I don't know what to do._

"You all right?" Light asked concernedly. He then chuckled. "You look like you've just seen a ghost or something," he joked.

L blinked and then shook his head. "Oh, n-no. It-It's nothing like that. I j-just don't know what to do right now. I... I've never been in a situation like this before."

Light smirked, his hand still atop L's. He gave it a gentle squeeze. "Well, there's still the matter of our topic of discussion. I've already told you who I like. Now, it's your turn. L, who do you like?"

L swallowed hard. Deep down, he knew the answer, and he'd honestly known it for a few months now. It had taken him a long time to recognize it and even longer to actually confirm it, but he knew with certain clarity that he was in love with Light Yagami. His brilliant mind couldn't quite figure it out, but this was the first time in his life that he was choosing to listen to his heart and not his brain. The latter had never steered him wrong before, but everyone always seemed to associate the emotion of love with the heart, so in a situation such as this... wouldn't it be logical to use that part of his body instead?

Logical. Right...

"I... I love you, Light Yagami."

Light's face immediately broke into a bright smile. This was incredible! He couldn't believe that L felt the same way about him! But, just to be sure...

"Are you sure, L? You're not just saying that because I said the same about you?"

"No," L shook his head, a small smile also finding its way to his face. "I really mean it, Light."

Light released L's hand and stood up to make his way around to the other side of the glass table, now standing directly in front of him. L looked up as Light brought a hand up to his face, slowly caressing the pale skin of his cheek and neck. His eyes widened when Light lowered his head and leaned in to press his lips against his own.

At first, L was unsure of how to react to the unexpected kiss. No one had ever kissed him on the lips before now and he wasn't quite sure how to handle it. But he soon relaxed and closed his eyes, deciding to allow Light to lead him.

The kiss was brief, but when they pulled away from each other and looked into the other's eyes, they both knew that it had conveyed everything they felt for each other. They could almost feel electric sparks shooting throughout their bodies, warming them with the feelings of love and acceptance. Light continued to stroke L's cheek as the older man closed his eyes and leaned into the touch, sighing in pleasure at the feel of it.

"Do you trust me, L?" Light asked him.

L opened his eyes to gaze into Light's, searching them for any signs of mistrust or deceit. But all he could find was compassion and lust. Lust for _him_. He smiled gently.

"Yes, Light. I trust you with my life."

Light couldn't help but smile back and immediately closed the distance between them with a rough kiss, holding the back of L's head steady with one hand as his other settled on his thigh. L was shocked at how much more passionate and powerful this kiss was compared to the previous one, but it only made him enjoy it more. He felt Light lick his lower lip and tentatively parted both of them to allow him access. Light took the opportunity with gusto and slipped his tongue into his new lover's mouth, exploring every inch of it he could reach. L moaned into the kiss as he felt the hot, slick organ gently caress the muscles and teeth of his mouth.

Light brushed his tongue against L's, coaxing it into playing with his own. L moaned, reaching up into Light's brown hair to run his fingers through it before accepting the challenge. Light sighed in pleasure and titled his head to deepen the kiss as he felt L's tongue rub his own. He pushed back, determined to win dominance over the kiss.

They both let out soft moans and sighs of pleasure as their lips and tongues collided, trying to make it last as long as they could. Eventually, they had to part for air.

Light opened his eyes and grinned when he saw L's dark orbs gazing deeply into his own, slightly glazed over in passion. He also noticed his lips, which were now red and wet from kissing. He leaned forward and whispered into L's ear that he knew was hidden somewhere behind his mop of hair as he rubbed his thigh.

"As much as I'm enjoying this, why don't you and I continue this in your bedroom?" he suggested.

L blushed at the teen's words and shivered at his touch. He was only able to groan a reply in affirmation, but it was enough for Light. He rose to his full height and brought L up with him. He captured the detective's mouth in another kiss, plundering it with his tongue as he put his hands on his hips and lead him to the bedroom. L wrapped his arms around Light's neck as he stumbled backwards toward his bedroom, both excited and anxious at how much further this would go tonight.


	5. The Silence of the Bell

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: This entire chapter basically IS a lemon.

Light closed the bedroom door with his foot as he continued his assault on L's mouth, pushing him closer and closer to the bed. The backs of L's knees bent as they connected with the foot of the bed and he lost his balance, causing him to fall back onto it. Light followed him down, still kissing him roughly as he brought a knee up between L's thighs, gently rubbing it against his crotch. He heard L groan into the kiss as he rested his hands on either side of him against the bed, holding off his weight.

Finally, after another few moments, they parted for air and looked into each other's eyes, their quick, labored breaths bouncing off of and colliding against their faces. L released one of his hands from around Light's neck to run his fingers through his brown hair, loving the soft feel of it between his fingers. In turn, Light used one of his own hands to brush L's dark bangs out of his equally dark eyes.

He was used to them scrutinizing and analyzing him as if he were the subject of an experiment he was conducting, but the only thing he saw in them right now was longing. Longing for his love, for his body, for _him_.

He couldn't contain the smile that lit up his whole face, and from L's position, what appeared to be the entire room. He just couldn't believe that L had not only accepted Light's love for him, but also felt the same way back and was now allowing access to him in the most intimate way. That alone was fueling him forward in his desires to make L his own.

L had left the curtains about halfway open to allow a substantial amount of light through the large window of his bedroom, but also just enough so that the average person wouldn't be able to easily see him through it on the outside of the building. A flash of lightning from the still-raging storm highlighted the teen's beautiful features and L barely paid any mind to the loud crackle of thunder seconds later. His heart was beating so fast in his chest that he mentally placed the wrath of the thunderstorm in a distant second to it.

The pause in their soon-to-be coupling didn't last much longer, as Light wasn't able to hold back the temptation of returning to L's delicious, kiss-bruised lips. L closed his eyes and moaned as the now-familiar feeling of Light's tongue sweeping his mouth made its presence known once more to him. Light was spurred on by the feel of L's tongue fighting his own and released his free hand from the bed to gently settle his weight on top of him, exciting both of them further.

Light knelt upon the bed as L scooted back toward the headboard until his head was lying comfortably upon the pillow. Light crawled up to him slowly, taking in every part of the beautiful body beneath him. L compared it to a cat stalking its prey, but the thought only turned him on even more. When Light's body was about even with L's, he lowered himself so that his weight now rested fully on top of him and returned to his lips.

L responded quite enthusiastically, groaning at the feeling of Light's weight on top of him. He wasn't heavy, but rather pressed down on him just enough to make it feel good. He wrapped his arms around Light's neck as the teen's hands slipped under the white cotton T-shirt L was wearing. He moaned into the kiss as Light's cool hands slid up and down his thin chest, having ideas of other parts of his body they could touch.

Light teased him for a few more moments before grabbing the hem of L's shirt and slowly pulling it up his chest. Once it was up and over his head, Light tossed the offending material somewhere off into the darkened room. He gazed down at the man's exposed chest, his mouth almost watering at the sight.

His upper body was thin and almost frail-looking in some areas, yet muscular and toned in others. The skin of his torso was a milky white like the rest of him, and Light couldn't resist any longer.

He leaned in for another kiss before slowly moving to L's neck, brushing his lips along his jawline and high cheekbones as he went. L moaned when he felt Light begin to lick and kiss the sensitive skin of his neck while running his hands up and down his chest. He couldn't hold back a garbled exclamation of Light's name when he felt the other suck at a certain spot on his neck and tilted his head to the side and slightly moved it back to give him better access. Light enjoyed the way L said his name like that and wanted to hear more from him, so he increased the sucking pressure on his neck as he moved down towards the dip between his neck and shoulder.

L shivered when Light's lips moved from his neck and across to his shoulder, then down to his collarbone and past his throat. He cried out when Light began licking at one of his pale pink nipples, stroking the bud with his tongue as he tweaked the other with his fingers. L moaned Light's name loudly when he felt him gently bite and nip the now-hard bud with his teeth and gripped the bed sheets. He panted and began moaning again when Light switched nipples to give the neglected one the same attention with his mouth while he rolled the other between his fingers.

Though he was thoroughly enjoying the teasing, L tilted Light's head up from his chest and pulled him back up to his mouth for a kiss. Light eagerly responded, thrusting and curling his tongue into the detective's mouth.

L groaned and placed his slightly shaking hands on Light's chest, making circles and small patterns into the material of his shirt. Light took the hint and pulled back only for a few moments to unbutton and discard his dress shirt. L almost gasped when he saw Light's bare chest. He knew he was athletic and in very good physical shape, but he'd never imagined him to be as muscular and strong-looking as he really was.

The muscles of his arms were defined and average sized; not too small, but not uncomfortably big, either. His abdomen was taught, expanding and contracting with every breath he took. His skin was an almost golden color from his time spent outside.

L pulled him in for another kiss and felt brave enough to run his hands over Light's chest. He felt the rippling muscles beneath his palms and was excited to hear Light gasp and groan at being touched back. He smirked and moved down to stroke his taught abdomen, getting a breathy moan from Light.

He was surprised to feel Light shove him down into the mattress and straddle his hips once more. He felt slightly nervous to see a half-predatory expression on the teenager's face as he pinned the older man's arms to the bed.

"You shouldn't have done that, L," he smirked almost evilly. "Now you're gonna get yours."

L gulped, feeling beads of sweat on his face. He wasn't so sure he liked the idea of this and began to show signs of fear.

Light noticed the change in L's demeanor and quickly replaced his aggressive act with compassion and concern. "L, what's wrong?" he reached out to stroke his cheek. "Was it something I did?"

He had a feeling what it was, but he wanted to hear it from L's own mouth.

L swallowed hard, nervously smiling. "I-It's okay, Light. I realize you were just j-joking. I guess I'm just not used to this kind of thing."

"Well, neither am I, L," Light shrugged seriously, "but even so, if I do something that bothers you or something you don't like, then please tell me. I don't want to rush things or scare you."

Light's eyes were filled with concern and understanding, and L knew in that moment that Light would be true to his word and wouldn't cause him any unnecessary harm. He smiled and leaned up to kiss the other man.

"I know, Light. I'm just a little nervous, that's all. I trust you."

Light smiled back. "Thank you, L," he caressed his messy black hair. "I know you're probably a little nervous, but... I promise you'll like what I have in mind."

L nodded, shivering slightly at Light's words. "Show me, then," he whispered.

Light then attacked L's mouth, pushing his tongue in as far as it could go. L fought back with his own tongue, gripping Light's strong back to aid him. Light eventually released him and began to run his lips and tongue down L's smooth chest as his hands slid down the sides of his torso. L moaned as Light kissed and licked, occasionally crying out in pleasure when he felt his teeth nip and graze his skin.

He squirmed when Light licked around his navel before dipping the tip of his tongue in, swirling it around and moving down to his abdomen. He kissed, licked, and sucked there as he unbuttoned L's jeans and slowly unzipped them, delighting in the way L continued to squirm beneath him. He pulled them down and off his legs, tossing the baggy article of clothing away. He smirked when he looked down to see a visible bulge in L's boxers. Apparently, L was enjoying this as much as he was.

L blushed furiously and turned his head away, embarrassed at having someone look at him like this. However, he soon closed his eyes and moaned deeply when he felt Light's hand gently rub and stroke him through his boxers. Light could feel him getting harder and harder by the second, feeling the organ pulse beneath his hand. He felt his own arousal grow and tried to suppress a groan of pleasure.

"L-Light, please..." L begged.

Light knew what he wanted and was more than happy to give it to him, so he quickly tugged the constricting boxers down and off of him. He kissed and nipped the sensitive insides of L's inner thighs, causing the older man to moan once more. Deciding he'd tortured L enough, he slowly licked up the underside of L's cock, tracing the sensitive vein with his tongue. He then licked around the tip for a few moments before taking it into his mouth and sucking gently.

L gasped and squirmed beneath him, unable to control his body's involuntary reactions to Light pleasuring him like this. He cried out when Light took him inch by inch into his warm mouth, stopping when he reached as far as he could go without gagging. He moaned deeply when Light began to slowly take him in and out of his mouth, moving his head up and down.

L's hips suddenly jerked upwards into Light's mouth, causing him to gag for a brief moment before holding L's hips down. L whimpered and tried feebly to thrust into that hot, wet orifice that was bringing him so much joy. He wanted to get deeper, further into his mouth, but he knew Light wouldn't allow him and kept his hold firm on L's slim hips. He slightly sped up as he wrapped his tongue along the bottom of L's length to tease him even further.

L's hands left the bed and moved into Light's soft brown hair, encouraging him to continue. Light kept a steady pace for another minute or so before speeding up and increasing the intensity of his mouth. L moaned and gripped Light's hair hard as he tried to thrust into Light's mouth again. Luckily, Light was still holding his hips down and avoided being choked.

L began to pant breathlessly and moaned Light's name over and over again as the pressure began to build up deep in his abdomen and spread to his arousal. Light sucked harder and faster, wanting to bring L to the release he'd been waiting for. He reached down to cup L's balls and gently massaged them with a careful hand, rubbing and squeezing ever so slightly.

L almost screamed Light's name when he reached his breaking point, arching his back and throwing back his head. He saw bright lights explode behind his eyes as he came into Light's waiting mouth, feeling his body tremble and shake. Light moaned and swallowed everything L gave him, not leaving a drop to waste. He cleaned the detective off with his tongue and licked away any of the remaining essence from his lips as he crawled back up to him.

He took L's face into his hands and kissed him gently as he came down from the mind-boggling experience. He felt L kiss back and wrap his arms around his neck, his breathing slowly returning to normal. Light released his mouth and buried his nose in the crook of his neck, running his fingers through his sweat dampened hair and deeply inhaling his intoxicating scent. He felt L's hands and fingers caress his back and gasped when they slid into his boxers to cup his bottom.

He pulled back to gaze down at L, seeing a look of arousal and confidence on his features.

L smiled up at him. "I want you, Light," he whispered. " _All_ of you."

Light swallowed, not thinking that L would have allowed things to go this far tonight. "A-Are you sure? We don't have to go any further if you don't want to..."

"I'm one hundred percent sure, Light," he nodded. "I've never been so sure of anything in my life."

Light quirked an eyebrow in disbelief before laughing, unable to hold it back. Only L would bring up percentages and probabilities in the middle of something like this. He just shook his head through his laughter and kissed L deeply.

L moaned and brought his hands back up into Light's hair, running his hands through the dark brown locks. Light drew back and got up from the bed to remove the rest of his clothing, dropping his pants and boxers at his feet and stepping out of them. He got back up onto the bed and kissed L once more.

"I'm going to get you ready so it won't be as uncomfortable later on, okay?" Light informed him once he released him.

L nodded, nervous but anxious. Light brought three of his fingers up to L's lips, rubbing them gently to get his attention. L instantly knew what Light wanted him to do and immediately sucked them into his mouth, bathing them with his lips and tongue. Light moaned and had to close his eyes as L passionately sucked on his fingers and coated them generously in saliva. Even something as simple as this was a huge turn-on for him and he wasn't sure how much longer he could hold back from taking L right then and there.

When he felt that his fingers were lubricated enough, he removed them from L's mouth and positioned one at his entrance as he slightly spread his legs for better access. He smiled, obviously enjoying the view. L blushed at Light's glance and fingers below.

Light looked back up at him. "Ready?" he asked.

L nodded, trying to smile despite his apprehension. "Yes."

Light slowly pushed his finger past the tight rings of muscle and into L. L groaned in slight discomfort and at the strange sensation of having something inside of him. He squirmed a bit and tried to relax as Light continued pushing the finger inside, but the burning sensation he felt grew in intensity the farther Light went. Light took notice of this and tried to soothe him.

"Just relax, okay? I know it's uncomfortable and might hurt a bit at first, but it gets so much better."

L nodded, gasping as Light's finger was now all the way in. He felt it slowly move out and then back in again, the burning sensation still there but beginning to slowly fade away. Light moved his finger back and forth, trying to get the tight muscles to relax for him.

Soon, the burn was almost fully gone and L's entrance was now much more relaxed. Light took this opportunity to insert a second finger and move them in and out in unison. L winced at the intrusion, but it quickly ebbed away and actually became somewhat enjoyable after a minute or so.

Light began scissoring them in and out, stretching the virginal opening. L moaned at this new sensation and began moving down on Light's fingers, wanting more of that feeling. Light raised himself up and kissed L deeply to distract him from slipping a third finger into him. He heard L's groan of slight discomfort and tried to quell it by pushing his tongue into his mouth. L couldn't resist and allowed his tongue to play with Light's, feeling the discomfort from below quickly leave him.

Light scissored and moved his fingers until he felt that L was prepared enough for him. He heard the other man whimper at the loss of his fingers and chuckled as he took his legs and placed them atop his shoulders. He positioned himself at L's entrance and waited for him to give him the okay. L drew in a deep breath and nodded once.

Light gripped L's hips and slowly pushed into him, hearing him grunt in pain and discomfort. He stopped for a moment, allowing L some time to adjust to him. When L felt he was ready for Light to continue, he pulled him down for a kiss as Light drove forward. L continued to make small sounds of discomfort and squeezed his eyes tightly shut until Light was fully sheathed within him.

Light pulled out of him and then pushed back in again before repeating and beginning to set up a slow, steady rhythm. He continued to kiss L deeply, hoping to take his mind off the pain for a bit. L eventually relaxed, feeling his muscles gradually stretch and fully adjust.

Soon, he was moaning in ecstasy as Light kept up his steady pace, rubbing his inner walls so slowly and deliciously. He felt a small amount of saliva dribble down his chin as their kiss intensified and felt Light begin to move faster into him. He gasped and then immediately moaned deeply when he felt Light brush against something deep within him that sent him into a blinding haze of pleasure.

"Th-There!" he cried out.

He began moving his hips against Light's and matched his motions with fervency. Light smirked, knowing he'd hit L's prostate and began to thrust harder and faster, determined to hit it again. L moaned again and again as his prostate was relentlessly assaulted, causing Light to moan as well.

"God, L," he breathed out. "You feel so good..."

L moaned loudly as a particularly rough thrust sent waves of incredible pleasure washing over his whole body and gripped Light's arms tightly. In turn, Light gripped the detective's pale hips even harder and thrust as hard and as fast as he could possibly go, moaning at the feeling of L's insides gripping him so tightly and wonderfully. He took hold of L's arousal and began stroking him in time with his thrusts, wanting to bring him to release at the same time as himself.

Their pants and moans grew in volume and frequency as Light's actions brought them closer and closer to the edge. L slammed his head back into the pillow as he felt his climax hit him like a freight train and screamed his lover's name as his hot release spread across their chests and abdomens. Light came shortly after, shaking and convulsing as L's contracting muscles milked his seed from him.

They collapsed next to each other on the bed, panting and desperately trying to control their quickened breaths. Light reached out for L, holding him close as the slightly smaller man returned the gesture and buried his head into Light's strong chest. After a few minutes, Light pulled out of L when their heart rates had returned to normal and carded his hands through the other's sweat dampened hair.

"How was that?" he asked with a devilish smile, knowing fully well just what L thought about it.

L smiled back, though his was more innocent than Light's. "Simply amazing. I hope we can do that again in the near future."

Light laughed. "Of course, because you're too damn sexy for me to keep my hands off of you!" He kissed L's forehead and whispered into his ear. "I'm gonna go grab our drinks from the other room; I think they've cooled off enough."

L nodded in agreement and gave Light a quick peck on the lips as he got up to leave the room. Sitting up in his usual position, L put a thumb up to his lips in thought.

He wasn't sure that what he had just done with Light was morally right or ethical, but right now, he didn't really care. For the first time in his existence, someone had taken an interest in him and actually wanted to share something special with him. Hopefully, for the rest of his life. Light hadn't done it just for release or because he was bored; L could tell from his eyes that he'd done it because he had genuinely _wanted_ to and wished to consummate something sacred between them. L would be damned if he would refuse this beautiful boy's advances toward him simply because of what others may think about their relationship.

All he knew was that he loved Light and Light loved him, and that was all that mattered to him.

Just then, the object of his thoughts came back into the room with a coffee mug in either hand. He had a smile on his face, but frowned when he closed the door behind him after noticing L's look of deep thought.

"What's wrong?" he asked as he handed L his mug and sat beside him on the side of the bed.

L glanced over at him with a smile. "Nothing," he shook his head. "I was just thinking too hard about something, I suppose."

Light smiled back. "Well, don't think at all. Let's just sit here, drink our hot chocolate, watch the storm, and enjoy each other, all right?"

L nodded in agreement, bringing the mug to his lips and taking a large sip as Light scooted closer to him and put an arm around his waist while he drank from his own mug. He watched the raging thunderstorm outside in fascination as L rested his head on Light's shoulder and sighed contentedly as he sipped more of his drink. They just sat there in silence for several minutes, happily watching the beauty of nature in each other's company.

After a while, they both began to fall asleep, so they mutually agreed to set their empty mugs on the nightstand and turn in for the night. Light pulled the covers over them for warmth and spooned up behind L, wrapping his arms protectively around him. L smiled and closed his eyes as he relaxed into the warmth of the teenage boy behind him.

Light pressed a kiss against his shoulder before brushing his lips near his ear. "Just one last thing, L; you said something about hearing a bell earlier. Well, I was just wondering... do you still hear it now?"

L fell silent, listening intently for the dreaded sound of that bell that had spelled his doom earlier today. But oddly enough, he didn't hear it. In fact, he could hardly even remember hearing it in the first place.

For once in his life, he was completely grateful to be alive and thanked whatever god he worshiped that he'd been spared to allow this incredible boy into his life. He smiled and gently shook his head, turning to face Light.

"No."

Light grinned broadly and kissed L, tasting every inch of the mouth he'd grown to love and treasure as much as the rest of the man. They both moaned into the passionate kiss, not wanting to be anywhere else in the world but here next to each other. They drew away and L turned back over to allow Light's arms to encircle him once more.

"I love you, L," he whispered.

"I love you too, Light," he whispered back.

Light rested his cheek in the crook of L's neck and smiled into the soft, warm skin as he closed his eyes. He'd made up his mind about letting L live and he was deadly serious about starting over with him. He would _never_ again jeopardize the lives of anyone for his own personal gain, no longer having a need for that kind of a life. He wasn't exactly sure how he would explain his actions as Kira to him down the road, or if he _ever_ would at all, but he was certain that no matter what happened, no matter what trials or tribulations befell them, they would have each other, and that was really all they would ever need.

Because in the end, as the saying went, love conquers all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that's the end! Thanks for reading; I really appreciate it!


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